About Me

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I have been at rock bottom and back. I want to share my journey with you. I have felt love deeper and stronger than I ever knew possible. I have grown closer to Christ and been influenced by amazing people.

Life....at last


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its funny

Its funny how some things in your life will change your life totally and some make no impact when they should. I guess its good to have those things that change your life as long as it is for the better. Weather you are leaving you life of crime and poverty to better yourself because you know that you better than that. Why should one person have what they want out of life and not another just because of where you grew up? If you want something enough then you can have it, I believe that, or at least I did. 

I have been through hell and back and I have learned a lot. I have grown a lot. And I feel like I have given my soul to God to have him help me make the right choice. And I thought or think I did. But when you sacrifice something that is a part of you, when you take the higher harder road, and you give yourself time to heal, aren't you supposed to just feel like you are on top of the world? I mean i dont believe in doing things to get something back, and that is not what i did, but i have to wonder. I feel like I have been through so much pain and heartache that by now I would have at least found a smidge of that one little thing that i didnt think exists. But it feels like I get further and further away from it.

Did I make a mistake? My family didnt like him, He was not right by me, but at the same time i knew him like no one else in the situation and he had a hard time dealing and that is how he dealt. Would he have been there for me more if I did what he wanted?? Would I have not gotten so hurt? Would he still be in my life? Its been two years and I still want him...is that normal? is that ok? Every guy I have ever dated i measure up to this one guy, before things went down on us... it was the best relationship i have ever had. EVER. no one even comes close to treating me how he did. I miss him. I miss him a lot. I want to be with him, and he has moved on and is so happy and im stuck. Im so happy he is happy, because when you love someone no matter what it takes you want them to be happy, even if it isnt with you. I wish i had the chance to have a second chance with him. But its over and I guess it will take time...I guess just longer than I had thought. But I have no closure with him, I want him to forgive me, tell me that he is ok and happy and that everything will be ok. I need to hear that but I guess I never will. Ill just go on, pretending im over him and that everything is ok, after all the only person i have control over is myself. Gotta make it work right? Be strong, stand tall and dont look back.

41 comments:

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如此的 said...

人必須心懷希望,才會活的快樂,日子才過得充實,有意義,有朝氣,有信心。........................................

身材維持 said...

thank u........................................

emily+brett said...

daniel! hey! i'm so glad i found your blog. what have you been up to? you have an amazing story and you have me in tears reading about your journey. love you girl!

驚訝 said...

你的部落帶給我愉快的心情,感謝~~..................................................

婉婷婉婷 said...

TAHNKS FOR YOUR SHARING~~~VERY NICE.................................................

RobinGallego0717俊毅 said...

路遙知馬力,日久見人心。......................................................

DexterSeibe2178 said...

精彩的文章是我停留的理由~........................................

義珊 said...

精彩的文章是我停留的理由~ .........................................

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念火 said...

No pains, no gains................................................................

登山 said...

人是受想像力所支配的。.............................................

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MauriceBaumer志能 said...

easier said than done. 一起努力吧! ....................................................

于呈均名 said...

與朋友在一起,分擔的痛苦是減半的痛苦,分享的快樂是加倍的快樂。..................................................

sisimao said...

財富並非永遠的朋友,但朋友卻是永遠的財富。 ............................................................

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冠慧 said...

愛情不是慈善事業,不能隨便施捨。..................................................................

育財 said...

死亡是悲哀的,但活得不快樂更悲哀。......................................................................

韋以韋以 said...

知識可以傳授,智慧卻不行。每個人必須成為他自己。.................................................................

美方 said...

當一個人內心能容納兩樣相互衝突的東西,這個人便開始變得有價值了。............................................................

芳容222許林堅林芳容儀 said...

向著星球長驅直進的人,反比踟躕在峽路上的人,更容易達到目的。............................................................

怡潔怡潔 said...

人有兩眼一舌,是為了觀察倍於說話的緣故。............................................................

幸雨幸雨 said...

這麼用心的經營你的文章, 當然值得我們留連拜訪的!............................................................

吳婷婷 said...

未來屬於那些相信他們美好夢想的人。......................................................

天花天花 said...

海鷗要高飛,必先遠退。花蜜要香醇,必先久釀。............................................................

芸茂芸茂 said...

Some people cannot see the wood for the trees.............................................................

紹函紹函 said...

生活總是起起伏伏,心情要保持快樂才好哦!!.......................................................

賴maeron曉ichards雨 said...

「仁慈」二個字,就能讓冬天三個月都溫暖。..................................................

徐禎緯 said...

Make hay while the sun shines...................................................

林宗羅嘉菱達 said...

良言一句三冬暖,惡語傷人六月寒。......................................................................

家文婷谷 said...

愛情是一種發明,需要不斷改良。只是,這種發明和其他發明不一樣,它沒有專利權,隨時會被人搶走。.................................................................

姜堯林智超玟 said...

宇宙萬物中,沒有比人的存在更值得驚訝的!是怎樣的緣份讓我能在分享你的心情~~............................................................

偉曹琬 said...

大家隨便說,說什麽都好,就是請不要惦惦..................................................................

童建李宜昌智 said...

好熱鬧喔 大家踴躍的留言 讓部落格更有活力..................................................

敬周喜 said...

生存乃是不斷地在內心與靈魂交戰;寫作是坐著審判自己。............................................................

怡靜怡靜怡靜怡雯 said...

當我微笑時,世界和我一起微笑;當我快樂時,世界和我一起活躍。..................................................

孟謝謝謝凱謝謝謝謝 said...

堅持是為著某種目的或目標,而持續不斷朝向既定方向努力的一種意念。..................................................

佳張張張張燕張張張張張 said...

很棒的分享~留言支持!............................................................

文岳仲君 said...

原來這世上能跟你共同領略一個笑話的人竟如此難得......................................................................